A few people have told me I should update this blog with the story and what's been going on since we found out the good news, and so I thought since I had the time, I would do just that.
First of all, let me just say PRAISE THE LORD! Seriously, stop right now and praise the Lord for his goodness. When I think back about our journey and how many of you have prayed for this, I get chills. For the first 3 years of our infertility, not many people knew of our struggle. Our hurt with infertility made us guard our hearts and it was difficult to let people in. After 1 round of IVF that was a failed attempt, we were so broken, we didn't know what else to do but to seek prayer from you. Over that next year, the Lord was yet again preparing our hearts for another go at IVF through a different clinic. This time, we knew the importance of prayer, and of letting you walk beside us in our journey. As you know, our second round of IVF had complications, resulting in Hyperstimulation which again led to a failed attempt. The encouragement we received during this time was incredible. So many more people found out about our story and struggle, and prayed with us over the next two months. As we entered our Frozen Embryo Cycle, I so desperately desired to see a positive result on our test, but knew that it was no longer about the result. It was about God getting glory, no matter what!
Finally, on August 21st we had our embryo transfer. One of the neatest things about IVF is you actually get a picture of your embryo, but then via ultrasound, you get to watch the injection of the embryo. This is just such a joy to see, and truly reminds me of the greatness of our Lord. After the transfer the doctor looked at Jeremy and I am said "And now you get pregnant." At these words, both of our hearts just kind of sank. After 4 years of infertility, and 2 failed fertility treatments, it seemed cruel to say such words, but we would just have to wait two weeks to see the results. But during these two weeks, I came to the full understanding of why God had let us wait so long, and it was for more people to know our story, not to pity us, or to give us attention, but His purpose was to bring Glory to himself through what he was about to do.
We were due to find out the results on Tuesday September 4th through a blood test at my doctors office. Monday morning, however, Jeremy and I had decided I would take an at home pregnancy test, to prepare us and give us an idea of what to expect the next day. Like many many mornings before, I unwillingly dragged myself to that bathroom with a test in hand preparing myself for the negative result I had seen plenty of times before. Before I could even set the test down, a very dark plus mark showed up. I was in so much denial, I thought it was the line that just confirmed the test worked. Once I realized that it was THE positive sign, I started shaking and burst into the bedroom to show Jeremy shouting "Jeremy....I think we are...I think we REALLY are pregnant!" He just stared at me, so I tried to show him the test. I was still shaking too bad though and couldn't hold the test still enough for him to see it. As soon as he realized it, he gave me the biggest hug I've ever received and his tears started flowing. We just kept saying "Praise the Lord, Praise the Lord!"
We decided just to be on the safe side, we would wait until the following day to find out 100% from the blood work that we were pregnant. That was such a difficult time not being able to say anything to anyone, especially since we were around family for a picnic that day. Those 24 hours seemed to go as slow as possible. But the next day, after my blood work was done, I received a phone call from my doctors office confirming my pregnancy. Her words were "We typically look for an HCG level of at least 100. Your HCG was 1800. You are DEFINITELY pregnant!" Again, I just started shaking, and kept telling Jeremy for the rest of the day "We are REALLY pregnant!" Needless to say, I was pretty giddy for a while.
We knew that a lot of people were praying for us, and we decided not to keep anyone else in suspense. We had a short list of people to either tell in person or over the phone, before it became public knowledge (aka facebook). One of my greatest joys so far, has been seeing those people who have been by our side, and lifting us up in prayer consistently praising the Lord and giving him ALL the glory for this huge blessing to our lives. With each "congratulations" we got, I just kept thinking, "Wow Lord, this is all YOUR glory!"
Exactly one week later, I was at work, when I started having heavy bleeding. The first words out of my mouth was "Please Lord, no!" I called my doctor right away, and they suggested I come in for blood work and an ultrasound. The whole way there, all I could do was pray as tears were streaming down my face. I just kept telling God that I know that this Baby is his, but was asking him to please to please show us mercy and let this baby be okay. I got there as quickly as I could and the nurses escorted me to the room right away. Sure enough, as healthy and normal as could be, there was our little blessing on the ultrasound. Again, PRAISE THE LORD!
Since then, Jeremy and I have been able to see the baby one other time, and actually got to see the heartbeat for the first time. What a miracle. We just feel so humbled and so blessed. And we are so thankful for you who have been praying for us. We are confident the Lord has gotten so much more glory through our struggle and pain, then he would have had he allowed us to get pregnant earlier on.
As I am typing, I am 7 and a half weeks pregnant. Our due date is May 9th, when we look forward to, Lord willing, welcoming Baby Roop into this world, and continuing to give God all the glory!
Monday, September 24, 2012
Thursday, August 16, 2012
5 days!
Hey everyone! We are quickly approaching our transfer date. In just 5 days (Tuesday, August 21st) we will FINALLY be having our embryo transfer. After my hyperstimulation, and waiting to get an appointment in the lab, we are finally back into daily injections and we are in the home stretch. My anxiety and excitement is starting to rise, but so is the nervousness.
Jeremy and I have taken the break from treatments to seriously consider and pray about what our next steps will be should this round of treatment fail. We feel that as difficult on my body as this is, and with my likeliness of hyperstimulating, regardless of the outcome, this will be our last attempt through IVF...at least for a while. Should God choose to give us a negative result, we will understand that this is his will and that he is closing that door for us for now. Sure, it will still be very difficult, but we are trying to mentally prepare for WHATEVER the Lord allows.
With all this being said, we are definitely in need of prayer. Of coarse we are praying for a positive result, so you can pray alongside of us with that. But we are also praying that should the outcome be negative that we will still find a way to glorify God. We know that last time, we had not prepared ourselves for the emotional toll it would take. Our hopes in opening up and sharing our personal journey with you this time, is that should we need it, we know many of you will be diligent in praying for our healing. But also, if it's positive, we will be able to all celebrate the Lords goodness and his miracle together. We are so thankful for those of you who do consistently pray for and encourage us. The body of Christ is such a wonderful thing!
Jeremy and I have taken the break from treatments to seriously consider and pray about what our next steps will be should this round of treatment fail. We feel that as difficult on my body as this is, and with my likeliness of hyperstimulating, regardless of the outcome, this will be our last attempt through IVF...at least for a while. Should God choose to give us a negative result, we will understand that this is his will and that he is closing that door for us for now. Sure, it will still be very difficult, but we are trying to mentally prepare for WHATEVER the Lord allows.
With all this being said, we are definitely in need of prayer. Of coarse we are praying for a positive result, so you can pray alongside of us with that. But we are also praying that should the outcome be negative that we will still find a way to glorify God. We know that last time, we had not prepared ourselves for the emotional toll it would take. Our hopes in opening up and sharing our personal journey with you this time, is that should we need it, we know many of you will be diligent in praying for our healing. But also, if it's positive, we will be able to all celebrate the Lords goodness and his miracle together. We are so thankful for those of you who do consistently pray for and encourage us. The body of Christ is such a wonderful thing!
Monday, July 9, 2012
A lesson (or two) in Patience
I know some of you have been asking for an update so that you can continue to know how to pray, so I thought I would take the time to update you on what's been going on the past few weeks, and what the plan from here is.
After the hyperstimulation, I went for my check-up appointment to see how things were going. My ovaries were still very much enlarged, and the fluid wasn't receding very much, so they decided to put me on a week of bed rest so that my body could try to correct everything so they would not have to drain the fluid. Patience test number 1. This was so difficult for me for many reasons. My life right now rarely allows for much down time and it was a big adjustment. I enjoyed the first day or so, but after that I felt so unproductive and it was hard to be patient and just rest.
After hyperstimulation the next step is to wait for your body to regulate, and for you to get back a normal cycle. Patience test number 2. As if I wasn't already feeling disappointment from a cancelled IVF cycle, now there is nothing I can do except wait for things to get back on track.
Next came the good news. My nurse called me and told me that she knows it can be dreadful just sitting around waiting or things to regulate again, so they were going to start me on a medication that would get me regulated and start my cycle within the next week! After this happened, I was to go to the office for monitoring to make sure my ovaries were back to normal.
Finally I was regulated and I was off to the doctors for that monitoring appointment. After waiting in the office for a while (Mini Patience test number 1) A doctor who has only seen me once before comes in with somewhat of a bewildered look on her face and asks "What are we doing here today?" That wasn't exactly reassuring, considering everything I had been through up to this point, and also the fact that she was the doctor, but somehow I managed to tell her what my nurse had instructed me to do, and that I was beginning a FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer) and so the doctor decided I should get my blood work done.
As I was sitting BACK in the waiting room for my bloodwork to be drawn (Mini Patience test number 2) a nurse who I do not normally see, came out and proceeded to tell me "Um, Nakeia, You actually need to go on birth control before you do an FET, so you did not even need to come in today so you can go ahead to the checkout counter" Patience test number 3. Major Patience test! I had been told by MY doctor and nurse that I would be having my FET done in just a few weeks. Never once was birth control mentioned, and now a doctor and nurse that don't know my history very well are telling me otherwise. I politely checked out and waited for my typical afternoon phone call from the office to try to figure this out. With that phone call, it was decided that since my doctor and nurse were not in, that I would wait until the next day to talk with my nurse about my FET plan. Patience test number 4.
The next day I had another disappointing conversation with my nurse. As it turns out, the lab where they perform the FET's closes down at the end of this month to do major cleaning and sterilization. Due to this, all transfers and FET's have been pushed back, making mine scheduled for August 21st. Patience test number 5. I know this may not seem super far away to some people. But to us, this is extremely far away. Considering this past Saturday would have been the day we found out originally if we were pregnant, and also that we were told we would only have to wait a few weeks to do the transfer and now it's 2 months later.
For some reason, the Lord feels like we really need a lesson in patience. Although we feel like we are patiently waiting, he keeps presenting us with situations where we have to wait more and more. We still know this will all be for his glory, and that our attitudes will determine how that happens. It is our prayer that we remain faithful, and keep our eyes focused on him, and that we do not lose hope by letting the discouragement get a foothold in our lives. So, if you are looking for something to be specifically praying for, join us in that, and that he will continue to bless us with encouragement. Thank you!
After the hyperstimulation, I went for my check-up appointment to see how things were going. My ovaries were still very much enlarged, and the fluid wasn't receding very much, so they decided to put me on a week of bed rest so that my body could try to correct everything so they would not have to drain the fluid. Patience test number 1. This was so difficult for me for many reasons. My life right now rarely allows for much down time and it was a big adjustment. I enjoyed the first day or so, but after that I felt so unproductive and it was hard to be patient and just rest.
After hyperstimulation the next step is to wait for your body to regulate, and for you to get back a normal cycle. Patience test number 2. As if I wasn't already feeling disappointment from a cancelled IVF cycle, now there is nothing I can do except wait for things to get back on track.
Next came the good news. My nurse called me and told me that she knows it can be dreadful just sitting around waiting or things to regulate again, so they were going to start me on a medication that would get me regulated and start my cycle within the next week! After this happened, I was to go to the office for monitoring to make sure my ovaries were back to normal.
Finally I was regulated and I was off to the doctors for that monitoring appointment. After waiting in the office for a while (Mini Patience test number 1) A doctor who has only seen me once before comes in with somewhat of a bewildered look on her face and asks "What are we doing here today?" That wasn't exactly reassuring, considering everything I had been through up to this point, and also the fact that she was the doctor, but somehow I managed to tell her what my nurse had instructed me to do, and that I was beginning a FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer) and so the doctor decided I should get my blood work done.
As I was sitting BACK in the waiting room for my bloodwork to be drawn (Mini Patience test number 2) a nurse who I do not normally see, came out and proceeded to tell me "Um, Nakeia, You actually need to go on birth control before you do an FET, so you did not even need to come in today so you can go ahead to the checkout counter" Patience test number 3. Major Patience test! I had been told by MY doctor and nurse that I would be having my FET done in just a few weeks. Never once was birth control mentioned, and now a doctor and nurse that don't know my history very well are telling me otherwise. I politely checked out and waited for my typical afternoon phone call from the office to try to figure this out. With that phone call, it was decided that since my doctor and nurse were not in, that I would wait until the next day to talk with my nurse about my FET plan. Patience test number 4.
The next day I had another disappointing conversation with my nurse. As it turns out, the lab where they perform the FET's closes down at the end of this month to do major cleaning and sterilization. Due to this, all transfers and FET's have been pushed back, making mine scheduled for August 21st. Patience test number 5. I know this may not seem super far away to some people. But to us, this is extremely far away. Considering this past Saturday would have been the day we found out originally if we were pregnant, and also that we were told we would only have to wait a few weeks to do the transfer and now it's 2 months later.
For some reason, the Lord feels like we really need a lesson in patience. Although we feel like we are patiently waiting, he keeps presenting us with situations where we have to wait more and more. We still know this will all be for his glory, and that our attitudes will determine how that happens. It is our prayer that we remain faithful, and keep our eyes focused on him, and that we do not lose hope by letting the discouragement get a foothold in our lives. So, if you are looking for something to be specifically praying for, join us in that, and that he will continue to bless us with encouragement. Thank you!
Monday, June 25, 2012
A let down & set back, but God is still good.
Most of you have heard, but in case you haven't, this past Saturday was supposed to be our embryo transfer. However, late last week I was showing signs of hyperstimulation and so they decided to do an ultrasound just to make sure this wasn't occurring. Many of you prayed for us, and unfortunately they found I was hyperstimulating. They found "extremely enlarged" ovaries, and at least 5 decent sized pockets of fluid, 3 in my lower abdomen, and 2 near my ribs.
The doctor decided to cancel the transfer, because what they believe triggered my hyperstimulation was the dose of HCG (the pregnancy hormone) I received through an IV during my egg retrieval. If they were to continue with the transfer, they are certain that since my body would continue to produce HCG that my hyperstimulation would just continue to worsen, and in some cases can lead to a stroke. They decided that for my safety and the safety of our future baby, we need to post-pone the transfer and do a frozen transfer next month.
This was quite the let down. I, of coarse, tried my best to prepare myself for the worst (hyperstimulation) but was having faith that God would do as he saw best. My transfer was scheduled for just a half hour later when we found out they were cancelling it, and the drive home was not as exciting and hope filled as I originally planned. Some tears were shed, but God is still good. He see's us through our difficult moments and remains faithful even when I don't.
So where are we? Currently, I am trying to take it easy. I am extremely uncomfortable due to the extreme bloating (I look like I could be pregnant, and someone has already asked if I was :) )and have moments of unbearably sharp pains. We are praying the Lord eases of me this, and that the fluid reduces quickly. We also are in a waiting game now for a few weeks until my body gets back to normal, before we begin the injections that it will take to do the frozen cycle. If our plans align with the Lords, we will be able to do the transfer next month.
I know I say it all the time, but I am so truly thankful for you and your diligence in lifting us up in your prayers. Jeremy and I have been so encouraged and this process has been a little less difficult knowing we have people walking this road with us. We feel blessed!
The doctor decided to cancel the transfer, because what they believe triggered my hyperstimulation was the dose of HCG (the pregnancy hormone) I received through an IV during my egg retrieval. If they were to continue with the transfer, they are certain that since my body would continue to produce HCG that my hyperstimulation would just continue to worsen, and in some cases can lead to a stroke. They decided that for my safety and the safety of our future baby, we need to post-pone the transfer and do a frozen transfer next month.
This was quite the let down. I, of coarse, tried my best to prepare myself for the worst (hyperstimulation) but was having faith that God would do as he saw best. My transfer was scheduled for just a half hour later when we found out they were cancelling it, and the drive home was not as exciting and hope filled as I originally planned. Some tears were shed, but God is still good. He see's us through our difficult moments and remains faithful even when I don't.
So where are we? Currently, I am trying to take it easy. I am extremely uncomfortable due to the extreme bloating (I look like I could be pregnant, and someone has already asked if I was :) )and have moments of unbearably sharp pains. We are praying the Lord eases of me this, and that the fluid reduces quickly. We also are in a waiting game now for a few weeks until my body gets back to normal, before we begin the injections that it will take to do the frozen cycle. If our plans align with the Lords, we will be able to do the transfer next month.
I know I say it all the time, but I am so truly thankful for you and your diligence in lifting us up in your prayers. Jeremy and I have been so encouraged and this process has been a little less difficult knowing we have people walking this road with us. We feel blessed!
Saturday, June 23, 2012
An Urgent Request
Over the past week, ever since my retrieval on Monday, I have had swelling and lower abdominal pains. Yesterday, it hadn't really gotten any better or worse since the surgery and it started to concern me that I might be experiencing what they call hyper stimulation. I left a message with my nurse explaining what I was experiencing and she relayed this to my doctor. My doctor then called me and told me that I am a high risk patient for hyper stimulation and she is very concerned that this is what I might be experiencing. However, she also said that it may just be that my ovaries have swelled from the surgery, which would not be as big of a deal.
So, today is the scheduled day of our embryo transfer. This is when they will transfer the embryos that have been growing into my uterus. However, due to my bloating and pain, I first will be having an ultrasound to determine if I am hyper stimulating. Dear friends, I am asking that you pray alongside of us that this is not the case. If I am hyper stimulating, they will not be able to do the transfer and will freeze the embryos we have, and we will have to wait another few weeks to transfer them. I know this is a very last minute request as my ultrasound is scheduled for 10am this morning, and my transfer is scheduled for 11:30am but I am confident God is still in control. Ultimately, pray that no matter what the outcome for today is, that God will be glorified.
So, today is the scheduled day of our embryo transfer. This is when they will transfer the embryos that have been growing into my uterus. However, due to my bloating and pain, I first will be having an ultrasound to determine if I am hyper stimulating. Dear friends, I am asking that you pray alongside of us that this is not the case. If I am hyper stimulating, they will not be able to do the transfer and will freeze the embryos we have, and we will have to wait another few weeks to transfer them. I know this is a very last minute request as my ultrasound is scheduled for 10am this morning, and my transfer is scheduled for 11:30am but I am confident God is still in control. Ultimately, pray that no matter what the outcome for today is, that God will be glorified.
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
A little request
Can I just start off by saying how wonderful you guys truly are? I mean it! I have been so incredibly blessed by an outpouring of support and encouragement over the past few weeks, and it just warms my heart so much to know that Jeremy and I are not walking through this process alone.
We got a call from our nurse, yesterday and today. Our 24 embryo's are still doing well and are growing very nicely. The doctor's are pleased with how smoothly things are going, and will continue to update us daily on their progress. I also got a call from my doctor today. This was really nice, because seriously, how often does our doctor actually call and check up on us? Anyways, she was calling to see how I was feeling, since I have so many eggs retrieved, she knew that I would still be feeling pretty sore and also to make sure I didn't have any symptoms of hyper stimulation. So we had a nice little chat, and then at the end she told me something that I have been dreading hearing from her. She feels as though with having 24 embryo's we will likely have many "perfect" embryo's to choose from, and therefore, only wants to transfer one. At the time I just let her talk, and figured I would chat with her about this on transfer day, but in the back of my mind I was saying "No way!"
Here is where we could use some prayer. It is very hard for me to want to transfer only 1. I know that there are high risks of multiples if we transfer two, therefore making it a high risk pregnancy. However, last time we went through IVF, we transferred two, and neither one of them took. I am praying for wisdom for what to do, and also to handle the situation in a God honoring way. I know that if I transfer one, and we have another failed IVF attempt, I will be thinking to myself, we should have transferred two. However, I also want to be able to trust the doctor's opinion. So, I'm just not sure what really to do, and I'm asking that you pray alongside of us, that we will make the wisest decision.
Our embryo transfer will take place this coming Saturday and so I have a few days to pray through all of this. I really appreciate you guys being so willing to pray alongside of us, and having you guys to turn to when we have these requests!
We got a call from our nurse, yesterday and today. Our 24 embryo's are still doing well and are growing very nicely. The doctor's are pleased with how smoothly things are going, and will continue to update us daily on their progress. I also got a call from my doctor today. This was really nice, because seriously, how often does our doctor actually call and check up on us? Anyways, she was calling to see how I was feeling, since I have so many eggs retrieved, she knew that I would still be feeling pretty sore and also to make sure I didn't have any symptoms of hyper stimulation. So we had a nice little chat, and then at the end she told me something that I have been dreading hearing from her. She feels as though with having 24 embryo's we will likely have many "perfect" embryo's to choose from, and therefore, only wants to transfer one. At the time I just let her talk, and figured I would chat with her about this on transfer day, but in the back of my mind I was saying "No way!"
Here is where we could use some prayer. It is very hard for me to want to transfer only 1. I know that there are high risks of multiples if we transfer two, therefore making it a high risk pregnancy. However, last time we went through IVF, we transferred two, and neither one of them took. I am praying for wisdom for what to do, and also to handle the situation in a God honoring way. I know that if I transfer one, and we have another failed IVF attempt, I will be thinking to myself, we should have transferred two. However, I also want to be able to trust the doctor's opinion. So, I'm just not sure what really to do, and I'm asking that you pray alongside of us, that we will make the wisest decision.
Our embryo transfer will take place this coming Saturday and so I have a few days to pray through all of this. I really appreciate you guys being so willing to pray alongside of us, and having you guys to turn to when we have these requests!
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Just a Quick little update
My nurse gave me a call this morning to update me on the status of our embryos. She told me that out of the 31 eggs they retrieved yesterday, 26 were considered mature, and 24 fertilized! Praise the Lord!! This is 6 times more than what we had last time! It's so wonderful to watch God continue to pour our His blessings. She said she is pretty sure we will have a day 5 transfer, which would be Saturday, but that she will let us know for sure tomorrow! We are so excited, and we continue to pray for God to continue blessing this process, and for a positive outcome in the end. Thanks for praying!
" Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change."
James 1:17
" Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change."
James 1:17
Monday, June 18, 2012
Retrieval Process
Before I jump in and tell you guys about the egg retrieval today, let me first catch you guys up on what has happened since my last post. I had to continue going to monitoring everyday, which meant blood work and an ultrasound every morning around 7am before work. Most people only have to go every few days, but because of my past history with IVF and also my "incredible response" to the medications, they wanted to watch me extremely closely. This week was utterly exhausting getting up at 5:45am giving myself my morning injection and then traveling a half hour to the doctor, then heading straight to work. I would come home, work on school and head to youth group with Jeremy (on the nights we had it) before giving myself my nightly injections and heading to bed. This is on top of Jeremy working two part time jobs and doing school too. This week, we really were able to draw our strength from the Lord and rely fully on him to get us through.
Saturday, we found out that my follicles were just about ready and so they had us meet with a nurse to go over our trigger instructions. Basically all that means, is that they stop the injections I have been on to escalate my estrogen level, and to grow my follicles and instead give my shot of another medication that tells my ovaries to prepare to release all the eggs I have been building up, so that the doctor can go in surgically and retrieve them. Last year when we went through this, the trigger shot was a difficult thing for us. Its an intramuscular injection which is painful, but also Jeremy has to administer it. Last time, the fertility clinic kind of scared Jeremy and told him if he gave it too high, he would paralyze me, and if it was too low, it would cause me insane pain. So when it came time for him to give me the shot last time, it didn't go so well because of his nervousness and I ended up giving it to myself. So this year, he was a bit nervous about doing it again. As we were talking to our nurse about this, she began to tell us some tips to help this go more smoothly. All of a sudden, she stopped and then remembered something. She proceeded to tell us that since they were triggering me with a different medication than they do with most patients because of my history that my injection would be subcutaneous instead. This was a huge blessing, because this is how I have been giving myself daily injections and its a much MUCH smaller needle, and a ton less painful. It was so neat to see how God provided even just that small comfort, when I have been asking you guys to pray alongside of us for my physical comfort. So once again, I just thank you for being so diligent in lifting us up in your prayers. God is so good!
So onto today. When I arrived to the center, they took my vitals, and hooked me up on the IV. I was a little nervous, because I really wanted them to have a good number of eggs to be able to fertilize and choose from. Last year when we went through IVF I had 6 eggs that were retrieved which is a great number, and of those 4 had fertilized so I was hoping for at least the same results this time. But I wasn't sure since I have been on different meds this time around. So long story short, Jeremy and I prayed together and then they took me to get all settled in the O.R. Before I knew it I was sleeping. The next thing I remember is hearing the nurse in the recovery room telling me that they retrieved 18 eggs! I remember thinking, this sounds great!...but then quickly falling back to sleep. I woke up to find my loving husband standing right by my side and he asked me if they told me how many eggs I had retrieved. I told him the nurse told me 18, and he said "No Kia, She said you had 31!" Praise the Lord!
Because I had so many, I was in a good amount of pain when I woke up and currently am still sore. They told me its going to take a few days for my swelling to go down and to feel 100%, but still Praise the Lord for his goodness! We were so blessed to have such a large amount of eggs, and Lord willing this will give us the best possible choice for perfect embryo's. It is so amazing to see him answer our prayers in ways we never expected. It excites Jeremy and I to see all the glory God is already getting through this process. That has been our prayer from day 1. That God would use our lives to give himself glory, and even through our infertility that is happening. That encourages our hearts so much. We appreciate the texts, phone calls, and messages that we have received today. You are such an encouragement to us and we are so grateful for you. You have made the process of us becoming vulnerable and letting you guys in very easy. Tomorrow, we will find out how many eggs have fertilized and then in the next 3-5 days they will transfer them in depending on how the embryos develop. We will update again once we find this information out. Below you will find a few pictures from today. Just excuse the way I look! :)
This is right after they put the IV in. Just anxiously waiting for the retrieval.
Me and my most favorite person in the whole wide world. I am so thankful for a loving, supportive husband!
Right after I came out of surgery. I get so drowsy from the anesthesia, plus they had pumped me with a lot of pain medication, so I was very sleepy!
Friday, June 15, 2012
Jeremy's Perspective
Hello everyone, this is Jeremy. We wanted to share with you another perspective of the IVF process for you to get a clearer picture of what is really going on.
As someone who does not have to get injections and daily monitoring appointments, (which consist of blood work and an ultrasound) IVF is a little different for me as the husband. I think one of the biggest issues I struggle with is guilt. Kia is having to give her self nightly and morning injections, go to this appointment and that appointment, get blood work done and I just kind of watch as it all happens. I feel that I am the majority of the reason of our infertility (even though Kia does not agree with me) and wish that I could take the brunt force of the hardships that Kia endures. I do believe her to be a strong woman, a wonderful wife and I believe in my heart that she will make a terrific mother. I see Proverbs 31 written all over her. If she is willing to do what she is doing now for just a mere possibility at conceiving a child, I can not imagine what this godly woman will do for the blessing that God will prayerfully give us. To God be the glory forever and ever.
I sometimes feel like I am not able to relate to Kia as she is going through this because I don't know what it's like to have a childbearing desire or a female reproductive system. I do appreciate all the women who are showing their support to Kia because I feel you are able to give her something that I am unable to. For the men who pray for us, I thank you too, just for different reasons. I am extremely encouraged to see the prayer support and friendship that is being shown to us through this process. I am looking forward to the upcoming weeks in which we will start to know whether or not IVF was successful. It sounds like the ball will be really rolling here in the next few days. Kia is going for another appointment Saturday and it may be her last day for the needle injections. What this means is that her follicles (eggss) are close to being ready to be surgically retrieved and fertilized most likely on Monday. I got to see one of her monitoring appointments today and the excitement is growing for sure. We hope to give you great news as we get it ourselves.
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Update from Monitoring Appointments
We just wanted to take a moment and update those of you who are praying so fervently for us during our IVF treatment. On Friday morning I had my first monitoring appointment since beginning my medications. As usual they did blood work and an ultrasound. On my ultrasound, they found that I was already responding extremely well to the meds. I had 15 follicles (potential eggs) on my right ovary, and 17 on my left. As the nurse so lovingly put it, I am a "follicle factory!" This has it's positives as well as it's negatives.
On my last IVF treatment, by the egg retrieval, I had over 60 follicles. My doctor believes this is one of the reasons we did not have a successful ivf treatment. The eggs were not able to grow to their full potential because then I ran the risk of hyper stimulating. However, with having a large amount, this also means more eggs to retrieve and fertilize which is a great plus. So, one thing you can pray for is that my response to the meds slow down, and that the follicles I have now are able to grow.
They also decided to see me again today, so I went for another monitoring appointment. I had my blood drawn and another ultrasound. The doctors don't begin to measure the follicles until they reach 10mm. Today they began to measure them and found that I had over 14 follicles that were over 10mm, so that means I'm starting to get close to retrieval. They will retrieve my eggs after they reach over the 15mm mark. By their estimates, my retrieval should be by Saturday!
My blood work showed that my estrogen levels haven't changed much since they lowered my meds, and they are a little high, so once again today they altered my dosage and they want to see me again tomorrow. So, in the meantime, here's a list of what you can be praying for:
1. We continue to glorify God, and others come to know Him through this process.
2. My levels come down, and my response to the meds continue to slow down a bit.
3. Comfort. I am very uncomfortable with my ovaries growing so rapidly. Also the daily blood work on my arms, and injections on my abdomen are becoming painful. I know this is just something you take on with this process, but any relief I could get would help!
I will do my best to keep everyone updated to the best of my ability. Thank you for your prayers, concern, and encouragement. Although I feel extremely vulnerable opening up and letting everyone in this time with our treatment, a word of encouragement here and there, or simply letting us know you are praying for us goes a long way, and helps bring us the peace we need to get through the day-to-day. Our hearts are very grateful for you all!
On my last IVF treatment, by the egg retrieval, I had over 60 follicles. My doctor believes this is one of the reasons we did not have a successful ivf treatment. The eggs were not able to grow to their full potential because then I ran the risk of hyper stimulating. However, with having a large amount, this also means more eggs to retrieve and fertilize which is a great plus. So, one thing you can pray for is that my response to the meds slow down, and that the follicles I have now are able to grow.
They also decided to see me again today, so I went for another monitoring appointment. I had my blood drawn and another ultrasound. The doctors don't begin to measure the follicles until they reach 10mm. Today they began to measure them and found that I had over 14 follicles that were over 10mm, so that means I'm starting to get close to retrieval. They will retrieve my eggs after they reach over the 15mm mark. By their estimates, my retrieval should be by Saturday!
My blood work showed that my estrogen levels haven't changed much since they lowered my meds, and they are a little high, so once again today they altered my dosage and they want to see me again tomorrow. So, in the meantime, here's a list of what you can be praying for:
1. We continue to glorify God, and others come to know Him through this process.
2. My levels come down, and my response to the meds continue to slow down a bit.
3. Comfort. I am very uncomfortable with my ovaries growing so rapidly. Also the daily blood work on my arms, and injections on my abdomen are becoming painful. I know this is just something you take on with this process, but any relief I could get would help!
I will do my best to keep everyone updated to the best of my ability. Thank you for your prayers, concern, and encouragement. Although I feel extremely vulnerable opening up and letting everyone in this time with our treatment, a word of encouragement here and there, or simply letting us know you are praying for us goes a long way, and helps bring us the peace we need to get through the day-to-day. Our hearts are very grateful for you all!
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Count Your Blessings Name Them One By One
One of my favorite things to do is to look back at past trials, and count the ways that God poured out his love and mercies even when I couldn't see it at the time. This past Sunday marked the 1 year anniversary of us receiving the devastating news that our first treatment of IVF had not worked. As I reflect on all that God has done in this past year, I see a ton of heart ache, disappointments and difficulties. But more vividly, I see His blessing's. He blessed us with a ton of support from people I never expected to care so much. He blessed us with a new ministry that brought us back closer to our family. He blessed us with peace as each month passed by. He blessed us with new friends. He blessed us with encouragement at exactly the moment we needed it. He blessed our marriage, and he has given me a godly husband who lets me know multiple times a day how much he loves and cares for me. He blessed us by giving us a very difficult trial, so that we could see his strength, and faithfulness, and blessed us with the perseverance to get though that trial.
One year later, where are we? Grateful. Grateful for everything he has allowed in our lives. This weekend, I will begin round 2 of IVF treatments and we are truly grateful that he is allowing us to do this again. It's a daunting task, but we know God is leading the way down this road again, and that he will be glorified no matter what. As many of you have told us that you will be praying, I decided to put together a list of a few things you can specifically be praying for.
1. God will prepare our hearts for WHATEVER he has in store for us.
2. That he uses our lives to bring him glory in whatever way he sees best.
3. God gives us the strength to get through this next month. IVF is a very tedious, and tiring process. With both Jeremy and I working and going to school full-time, the extra early mornings and trips for daily appointments takes it's toll.
4. That through this process, somehow other's will come to know Christ as their personal Savior.
You guys are amazing, and the love and encouragement you pour out on us is beyond incredible. I will be doing my best to keep this updated at least weekly to let everyone know how things are going, and how you can be praying more specifically. Thanks guys!
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ." Ephesians 1:3
One year later, where are we? Grateful. Grateful for everything he has allowed in our lives. This weekend, I will begin round 2 of IVF treatments and we are truly grateful that he is allowing us to do this again. It's a daunting task, but we know God is leading the way down this road again, and that he will be glorified no matter what. As many of you have told us that you will be praying, I decided to put together a list of a few things you can specifically be praying for.
1. God will prepare our hearts for WHATEVER he has in store for us.
2. That he uses our lives to bring him glory in whatever way he sees best.
3. God gives us the strength to get through this next month. IVF is a very tedious, and tiring process. With both Jeremy and I working and going to school full-time, the extra early mornings and trips for daily appointments takes it's toll.
4. That through this process, somehow other's will come to know Christ as their personal Savior.
You guys are amazing, and the love and encouragement you pour out on us is beyond incredible. I will be doing my best to keep this updated at least weekly to let everyone know how things are going, and how you can be praying more specifically. Thanks guys!
"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ." Ephesians 1:3
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Glory if we do, Glory if we don't
Isn't it funny how God works in His own perfect timing? It's something that can neither be rushed, nor stopped. When God decides it's time for something, He always just allows everything to fall into place. Well, with that being said, it seems like he has decided it's time for us to try IVF again.
It's been exactly a year since we had a failed IVF attempt. This past year has been filled with ups and downs, and monthly disappointments. We have been in prayer that if IVF was in our future again, that he would heal our wounds and provide comfort during the process and open the door widely for us to know we should walk through it. And wouldn't you know he has done exactly that.
A few months ago, God led us through the doors of Shady Grove Fertility Center. The staff was so wonderful, and so sympathetic towards us. They understood everything we had been through in the past few years, and yet reassured us that not all hope was lost. We knew that if IVF was going to happen again, God was going to have to perform one of his miracles and provide the finances for us. Neither of us had insurance, and it was going to cost a good chunk of change for us to be able to do this again. After a few months of praying that God would make this very clear, he has provided insurance for me, and has provided the finances for us to be able to do IVF.
We have chosen to take part in the shared-risk program. Basically that means we pay for 6 fresh cycle attempts, and if after those attempts we have not delivered a live baby, we get 100% refund. This has benefits for us. The way we look at it, if we do not deliver our own baby, we will understand that was not God's will for our lives, and we will have the finances to begin down the road of adoption. Our plan (and of coarse God can always change it) is to start the first IVF cycle in June. This will allow us time to get a few tests done in May that we need to complete, and will give us time to prepare our hearts for whatever God decides.
So, this is where you guys come into the picture. Clearly, this time around, we have decided to allow you into our journey. Last time, we kept it private, and then after it failed we opened up and sought prayer from you for healing. This time, we would be honored if you would go before the Lord, and pray for us before, during, and after, no matter what the outcome. It is our strongest, sincere desire to have children of our own and to raise them to love and serve Jesus Christ. However, we understand that realistically that may not be God's plan for us. So, we ask that you pray for a few things. 1, that God would grant us the desire of our heart and bless us with children. 2, that God will grant us the strength and energy that IVF drains us of. And 3, that if Gods decides it is best that we do not become pregnant, that we accept it, and give him all the glory anyway. Ultimately, that is what this life is about...giving God glory. So if we become pregnant, God gets the glory, and if we don't, God still gets the glory.
We appreciate you guys so much, and your willingness to pray on our behalf. We plan to keep the blog updated through-out this process, but wont necessarily be posting this info on facebook, so be sure to follow the blog so you can know how to pray accordingly.
"This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord’s people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. Because of the service by which you have proved yourselves, others will praise God for the obedience that accompanies your confession of the gospel of Christ, and for your generosity in sharing with them and with everyone else."
-2 Corinthians 9:12-13
It's been exactly a year since we had a failed IVF attempt. This past year has been filled with ups and downs, and monthly disappointments. We have been in prayer that if IVF was in our future again, that he would heal our wounds and provide comfort during the process and open the door widely for us to know we should walk through it. And wouldn't you know he has done exactly that.
A few months ago, God led us through the doors of Shady Grove Fertility Center. The staff was so wonderful, and so sympathetic towards us. They understood everything we had been through in the past few years, and yet reassured us that not all hope was lost. We knew that if IVF was going to happen again, God was going to have to perform one of his miracles and provide the finances for us. Neither of us had insurance, and it was going to cost a good chunk of change for us to be able to do this again. After a few months of praying that God would make this very clear, he has provided insurance for me, and has provided the finances for us to be able to do IVF.
We have chosen to take part in the shared-risk program. Basically that means we pay for 6 fresh cycle attempts, and if after those attempts we have not delivered a live baby, we get 100% refund. This has benefits for us. The way we look at it, if we do not deliver our own baby, we will understand that was not God's will for our lives, and we will have the finances to begin down the road of adoption. Our plan (and of coarse God can always change it) is to start the first IVF cycle in June. This will allow us time to get a few tests done in May that we need to complete, and will give us time to prepare our hearts for whatever God decides.
So, this is where you guys come into the picture. Clearly, this time around, we have decided to allow you into our journey. Last time, we kept it private, and then after it failed we opened up and sought prayer from you for healing. This time, we would be honored if you would go before the Lord, and pray for us before, during, and after, no matter what the outcome. It is our strongest, sincere desire to have children of our own and to raise them to love and serve Jesus Christ. However, we understand that realistically that may not be God's plan for us. So, we ask that you pray for a few things. 1, that God would grant us the desire of our heart and bless us with children. 2, that God will grant us the strength and energy that IVF drains us of. And 3, that if Gods decides it is best that we do not become pregnant, that we accept it, and give him all the glory anyway. Ultimately, that is what this life is about...giving God glory. So if we become pregnant, God gets the glory, and if we don't, God still gets the glory.
We appreciate you guys so much, and your willingness to pray on our behalf. We plan to keep the blog updated through-out this process, but wont necessarily be posting this info on facebook, so be sure to follow the blog so you can know how to pray accordingly.
"This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord’s people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. Because of the service by which you have proved yourselves, others will praise God for the obedience that accompanies your confession of the gospel of Christ, and for your generosity in sharing with them and with everyone else."
-2 Corinthians 9:12-13
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