A conversation with God

I have so many things that I want to say
But I can't seem to find the words.

I want You to know how much I'm hurting
But You already know, You're the one that allowed the pain.

I feel like I am drowning in a sea of tears
But I know I'm only in this place so You can rescue me.

My heart is completely torn to pieces
But I know You are holding it together with Your crown of thorns.

I don't understand the pain You've allowed
But it's okay, I don't need to, You are God, I am not.

I know one day this will all be used for Your glory
But right now I feel like its a waste.

I know You are there to carry me through this
But I feel like You have left me here abandoned.

I know You think I'm strong enough to handle this
But I feel like I am too weak to take another step

I know You tell me its okay to feel sorrow and heartache
But I feel like I have to put on a smile

My greatest desire is to honor You with this pain
But I know I cannot do it on my own, I need Your help

I know Your plan for my life is bigger than what I can see
But all I want for my life is to be 'home' with You

But let my life be a song You sing
Even if that means living with a broken heart.

And thank you for allowing me the privilege to suffer through trials for Your names sake.
Please let those trials be an example of your mercy, love and grace to others.
I Love You.